The Psychology of Time: How to Live Fully in the Present Moment
- Hilary Valdez
- 4 days ago
- 4 min read
A meaningful life is not measured in years, but in how consciously time is lived.
Newton described time as absolute, meaning it exists whether anything happens or not. Time in psychology is not just something that passes, it’s something we participate in. Science asks what time is in the structure of reality?
In my previous role as program director for in-patient care at Yokosuka Naval Hospital in Japan, making health and safety checks on SOFA military prisoners detained at a nearby prison was part of my duties. Kurihama Prison in Yokosuka City dates back to 1883 and serves as a confinement facility for SOFA members who have been convicted of felony crimes. Walking down the small dark hallways of the prison, the lingering stale odors and musty draft from decades ago would surround me. The clammy air reeked of a forgotten era held captive against eternity’s time.
Inside the prison, time stopped for all the criminals. Traces of pre-war strictness and rigidity still existed. Daily prison life emphasized routine, discipline, collective responsibility, respect for rules and quiet endurance. Long hours of regulated routine, zero personal freedom and limited communication was the rule.
Obedience and order was the strong expectation of everyone confined. The first prisoner I spoke with was crying in his stark concrete cell, his eyes swollen with despair. I asked how long his sentence was, “I was handed a ‘Big [expletive],’” he said, meaning 50 years. I asked the other prisoner the same question, as he sat on a steel cot, to which he replied, “A Baby [expletive],” or 25 years. They wanted me to help them get released; I could not do that. Seems each prisoner had taken the vow of poverty; the cell had a small ceiling window and a porcelain sink. The three of us remained quiet surrounded in an abyss of solitude.
Existential psychologist Viktor Frankl perceives time as central to human meaning. “A meaningful life is not measured in years, but in how consciously time is lived. Awareness of limited time creates urgency and purpose. People find meaning by how they choose to use their time,” Frankle said. Psychologically, our relationship with time can influence our well-being. Learning to be present, to notice, to engage, to appreciate your moment in time, can transform your experience of time from something that pressures you into something that supports you. “Be here, be now,” as the hippies used to say.
The present moment is where life actually unfolds. The present moment is where freedom and responsibility meet. The way we spend our time becomes the story of who we are. Time is impartial; it gives equally, but we receive it differently. In rushing through time, we often miss the life within it. Time tests all things, beliefs, relationships, and the self. To honor time is to live with intention rather than regret.
For the prisoners serving life sentences, an hour can feel like a moment in joy and a moment can feel like an eternity in sorrow. In this way, time is not only a physical dimension but also a psychological and emotional reality. Sigmund Freud believed that “trauma could feel timeless,” resurfacing repeatedly: “The unconscious mind does not follow clock-time, it holds past experiences as if they are still present.” Being alone in a cell trapped in your thoughts can become psychologically depleting and dangerous. The present moment is where life truly happens. And for the inmates what is called “passing time” is, in truth, time passing them.
Time carries meaning. It is the medium through which change occurs. Every relationship evolves in time. Every wound, whether physical or emotional, meets time as part of its healing process. As the saying goes hold on to HOPE or Hold On Pain Ends. Even suffering, though painful in the present, often gains perspective over time, allowing insight and sometimes wisdom to emerge. In this sense, time is not simply something we endure, it is something that shapes and refines us.
Our time on earth is finite. This awareness can be unsettling and it can also be grounding. It encourages us to prioritize what truly matters: relationships, purpose, and inner peace. Time, in this sense, becomes a teacher, urging us toward a more meaningful way of living.
Though we cannot slow time or stop it or reverse it, we can choose how we meet it. We can move through time with intention rather than distraction, with awareness rather than haste. And in doing so, we may come to see that time is not simply passing, but offering us, moment by moment, the opportunity to live more fully. What does time mean to you? What do you do with your time? What are you thinks about all day? Choose wisely.
About the Author:
Hilary Valdez is a freelancer living in Tokyo, Japan. He is an experienced Mental Health professional and Resiliency Trainer. Valdez is a former Marine and has worked with the military most of his career and most recently worked at Camp Zama as a Master Resiliency Trainer. Valdez now has a private practice and publishes books on social and psychological issues. His books are available on Amazon and for Kindle. Learn more about Valdez and contact him at his website or email (InstantInsights@hotmail.com). Follow his YouTube channel Hilary’s Quick Talk for more insights.
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